Our family participated in National adoption Day yesterday. We adopted our 10-year-old daughter who has lived with us for the past three years, minus 12 days. Our other six adoptions were finalized in individual, private, adoption court hearings. Many adoptions are now being finalized without the family attending an actual court hearing. The judge signs the order and the family receives the paperwork in the mail a few days later.

If you had a choice which method would you prefer? Would your child prefer that same method, or a different one? I thought I would share our experiences, and the reasoning behind other choices, to help you decide if you get to choose your adoption process.

The individual court hearings are formal and all about your child’s adoption. In the past, we invited our relatives and birth relatives. Everyone in our family dresses up and the adoptee chooses a new outfit. We purchased individual roses for the adoptee to pass out to those present, including one to the judge and the court recorder. These hearings lasted between 10 and 30 minutes. We were allowed to take photos, explore the courtroom, hug the judge, which created a lasting memory for our child. The children left the courtroom feeling adopted, as if something special had just happened.

Currently, if you desire this type of hearing in our county, it will add at least two months to the date you can finalize. Many people are not choosing this option because they want to finalize their adoption as soon as possible. The child has probably been waiting quite a while to be adopted, as in our case.

If the judge signs the order of adoption and you receive it in the mail, it is still a legal adoption. There is no special ceremony, unless you choose to take your child to dinner or throw a party. Many of my friends have chosen this option because their adoptions could be finalized within a couple of weeks. Their children had been waiting over three years to be adopted.

Many adoptions are finalized on National Adoption Day. I believe that 21 children were adopted into 15 families at our hearing. The judges completed in one hour, what would have taken approximately seven hours in individual hearings, expediting the process. We were given a choice of participating in adoption day and finalizing this week. If we opted for just having the judge sign the paper without a hearing that would have been about two weeks later. That is because all efforts were focused on adoption day. If we wanted an individual hearing, it would have been next year in January or February.

Participating in National Adoption Day still gave us a court hearing so the child could see that something special was happening. The judge formally introduced the children by their new names making them feel special. The children could see that other children were in the same situation, which would help to alleviate feelings of being weird or different. However, each family was rushed through the process eliminating feelings of uniqueness. It was preferable, in my opinion, to no court hearing though. If this allows more children to be adopted each year then I’m all for it.


Blogs on foster care adoption
That’s My Brother, We Came from the Same Mom
Who’s a Sibling in Adoption? Who isn’t?
Why should siblings be placed together?
Should Siblings Available for Adoption be Placed with Their Already Adopted Siblings?

Photo Credit 2007 Julia Fuller