My youngest 3 children struggle with letting go of some of their orphanage behaviors. As I have mentioned here, they all struggle with food issues and accepting that they will indeed have plenty to eat in our family. All 3 have known pretty intense hunger, so their fears are valid, but you would think that over time, they would be able to process that they have not known true hunger (other than Caleb's experience here) since arriving in our home. I guess like many issues, its a matter of your head knowing something but your heart not quite believing it.

Unfortunately, behaviors that kept my children alive in an orphanage are often not behaviors that we want our children to have when they are home with us. Eating 90 mph until you almost vomit might make sure you get enough food when you're in an orphanage, but it isn't real endearing to watch around our family dinner table.

Along the same lines, hiding and hoarding food is a strong survival technique, but when it attracts ants to your bedroom, Mom isn't real pleased.

When I visited Micheline in Haiti numerous times, she thought nothing of saying "Mama mwen" meaning "My Mama!" as she shoved other children off of my lap. At the time I thought it was at least a tiny bit cute. After all, I was flattered that she recognized me as her mother and wanted me all to herself. Now when she is incredibly jealous when I even hug one of her brothers and gives me a look that I imagine a betrayed spouse would give, the possessiveness isn't so cute anymore.

Change is difficult, but trusting enough to let go and move on is part of what I must teach my children in my role as their mother. Our family has had some struggles recently with behaviors and they have caused me to reevaluate my role as a blogger. I have loved blogging for adoption.com for the past five months, but just as my children need to let go of behaviors that are no longer serving a functional purpose, I have decided to let go of blogging.

I have enjoyed the comments from readers, enjoyed researching topics, and just overall enjoyed sharing a part of my life with you. However, to continue to blog at this time when other duties are calling me would not be a wise choice. Living in the real world needs to take precedence over writing about my world.

It is time to turn the reins of this blog over to someone else. I will blog for one more week, after which I will still be around, but only as a reader rather than a blogger. If you are interested in blogging for adoption.com, follow the instructions found on the editor's blog here.

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