I have a treat for all of you today. It's an article and poem written by Jason Minh Alt, who was born in South Vietnam, and fled during Operation Babylift. It was previously printed in the Southern Arizona Families with Children from China newsletter a few years back when I was the newsletter editor.

You may wonder what it has to do with adoption. Like many adoptive parents who have adopted internationally, my children are of a variety of races. I have four biological children who though contain a smidgen (1/8)of Mexican blood, by all appearances are your average Caucasian looking Americans. I also have two Asian sons and a Haitian daughter and often wonder how the race factor will play out in our family as they all grow up.

Will my children struggle with some telling others they can never understand how they feel to be a minority within a majority white culture? Will my younger three teach more empathy to the older four on what it feels like to be a minority, or will my older children experience that on their own as we have become a minority family who receives more than our fair share of stares and double-takes?

Will Micheline tell Ben and Caleb that her life is much harder than theirs because her skin is darker? Or will Caleb argue that he has it worse because he will always carry an accent, not learning English until the age of 12? Ben might tell them both that his life is more difficult as both an Asian minority and a Deaf person. I just don't know how it will all play out, but as the mother of a variety of races, I was fascinated by Jason's viewpoint.

I have great admiration for black leaders but I will not endorse discussions of "who's got it worse" because for every atrocity that they state, we as Asian Americans can counter with one of our own. There is NO victory in hanging our heads and "wishing" that things would be different. There is no victory in pity. There is no victory in being able to spout racial hate crime and injustice in unison because we both come out losers. Redlining in residential neighborhoods, poverty, gang violence..... our communities share commonalities because both black and Asian communities "boast" these concerns and although it may have begun in black neighborhoods (for the most part), this is our collective realities now. Our histories are both marred with racism. Does it really matter who is given it worse, because in my opinion we both got it fairly bad.

Unfortunately, I have been involved in discussions with Black activists who refuse to acknowledge the injustices that hurt the Asian American community. They cannot proceed past a mentality that they have it the "worst" or that "oppression against the other coloreds is not as bad or problematic" but I think that it is easier to get out of the bottom of the barrel with the assistance of those who are there with you. Cooperation, communication, and collaboration.

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