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I’ve blogged ad nauseum about our youngest. His older sister was crazy about us from the first time she talked to us on the phone, but my youngest was not so sure. When we went to meet the kids, though he had fun, he had a “little pout” to his lip, according to his older sister, and my husband!
He was thoroughly attached to both of his foster parents, and still enjoys talking to them. He’s a little conundrum, because he’ll make friends quickly. So quickly, in fact, I was afraid he might have an attachment disorder of some sort, because he would meet someone (males in particular – the females he took longer to warm up to!), and next thing you know, he’d ask to sit next to them or crawl up into a lap! Yet, when you really tried to snuggle with him, he was a little resistant, and would ask for one of his foster parents (up until shortly after we arrived back home with them after the adoption).
But after a year, he has come such a long way with his emotions! And, tonight, he gave my husband an early Father’s Day gift!
My husband was supervising him in the shower, and apparently my youngest gets very wiggly and giggly in the shower. He considers it special time with his dad, and tonight he took full advantage of it. He said, “You’re my only Dad – and I’m only your son!” My husband was so touched by that, because we both know the journey this past year has been for our son.
Our youngest remembers his birth mother and her family, and we still stay in touch with them. But his foster father was really the only other male role model he had in his short little life. His foster parents were firm in not allowing the kids to call them Mom and Dad, knowing a day like this would come. I thank them for their wisdom in that!
This caps off what I’ve been trying to summarize in my posts this week. The quality of our relationship has changed with the kids recently. It’s gotten deeper, as though the kids really understand that they are really in a permanent family. The hugs have been different. The interactions have been different. The seem truly happy on a deeper level than just having their needs met or having a cool oder playmate in our son. Maybe it’s because we made such a big deal of our anniversary last week. Maybe they now know on some subconscious plane of thought that we really are going to be here for them, as we said we would, and whatever their behavior is or has been, we will stick together and work it out. Whatever the reason, I’m thankful that they’ve gotten the message, and that my husband got a wonderful and priceless gift: the adoring love of a precious child.
