Our adult daughter called Sunday morning, “What are you having for lunch?” she asked. The same thing we always have of course. I think I may have been cooking the exact same Sunday morning brunch after church for the past 15 years. I guess that makes it a family tradition. “Do you mind if we join you?” she asked, referring to herself and her new husband.

Children who have suffered trauma seem to appreciate routine and consistency. Even when they grow up, they like to think that everything is the same as it always was at home.

Of course, we didn’t... more

Did sitting around like couch potatoes all day just watching TV cause the behavior problems of the siblings you adopted? There are those who suggest that TV is responsible for everything from lethargy and obesity to shortened attention spans. A new study even suggests that if you begin limiting your children’s TV viewing before the age of six, you may be able to reverse the negative effects.

The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests that kids shouldn’t watch TV for more than two hours a day and children under two shouldn’t watch it at all. Researchers... more

Today is Ty’s birthday and he is quite proud to be eight years old. He has been counting down the days for the past two months. Mom, “Now how many more days do I have until my birthday?” Each day he thought of a new gift that he absolutely could not live without. He even convinced his brothers and sisters that they should give him gifts, as well. Of course, convincing them wasn’t too difficult, because he is everyone’s favorite little brother.

I was a little surprised when two of his older brothers each purchased him a $30 gift. Considering their limited... more

Researchers have recently proven that the body’s stress response system can be favorably altered by family intervention during the preschool years. Preschoolers involved in this recent study were considered high risk for antisocial behavior because they had an older delinquent sibling. These preschoolers displayed an atypical stress response during testing. Older youth with conduct disorders usually also have this atypical response to stress.

The cortisol levels in the preschoolers' saliva did not show a normal spike in anticipation of a stressful situation... more

A friend called me yesterday nearly hysterical. When she dropped the girls off at school she overheard the 11 year old telling the nine year old not to worry, that she would kill her when she got home. When my friend got back home, she decided to search the bedroom of the 11 year old. That is when my friend really got upset. You see, she found a note, written by the 11 year old, to her therapist apologizing for killing her little sister.

My friend had already been in touch with her daughter’s therapist, explained the note, and faxed a copy to her. The therapist had agreed... more

Whether you have just adopted a sibling group or intend to adopt siblings soon, you should be extremely cautious about having them share a bedroom. If you are considering having the siblings share a bedroom with each other or with one of the children already in your home, you might want to reconsider if you have enough bedrooms. If you must have them share a room, consider hiding baby monitors under or near the beds. If you allow your children to play in each other’s bedrooms then you should also consider hiding monitors in the bedrooms so you can hear what is going... more

The unwritten pact among brothers and sisters, never tell who did it, no matter what. We would rather do extra chores around the house, side by side all week long, be grounded from video games, and not have bedtime treat, then to confess, who did it.

They certainly are not anything like I was as a child. I hate to confess to all of you that I was a brat. If one of my sisters had caused me to do extra chores because she didn’t want to confess her guilt, I probably would have beaten the snot out of her. I am thinking that I would have pummeled her until she confessed... more

Looking for ideas to make your adopted children really feel like part of their new family? You probably want to establish family memories that your adopted children will enjoy, consider unique, and want to talk about later. Fun things that they will want to take pictures of and put in their life books or scrapbooks. I came across an article yesterday in the Clean Home Journal suggesting fun family autumn ideas. I always seem to put an adoption spin on things that I see and read, even though that wasn’t the author’s original intention. This pumpkin carving... more

An interesting comment was made at our daughter’s wedding a couple of weeks ago. A neighbor of theirs was attending the wedding. Afterward he and his wife approached me and introduced themselves as my daughter and son-in-law’s next-door neighbor. He indicated how much his family enjoyed having my daughter’s family next door. This neighbor also knows my other adult daughter because she watches her birth sister’s children Monday through Friday. After he introduces himself, he says, “I knew immediately that you were their mother because they look just like you.”

I smiled, agreed... more

At a traditional wedding ceremony, the bride throws the bouquet and the girl who catches it is the next to be married, or so the story goes. When our oldest daughter married a couple of weeks ago, the single women lined up for a chance to catch the bouquet and a dream of being married next. Of course, all of her sisters, except Amigrace because she is only one, lined up as well. Who should jump out to clutch the bouquet from the air? Our Lyn, who will turn 14 in a couple of weeks, that’s who.

I am sure that our daughter, the bride, would not have aimed the bouquet... more