Families who adopt infants sometimes believe that with their love and care their child will develop normally, without any special needs. However, if there are older siblings, it is wise to consider their diagnoses if they have them. Many conditions are hereditary in nature. While a loving and stimulating environment will give a child the best possible future outcome, it doesn’t erase genetic predisposition.

I have a friend who adopted two brothers, 11 months apart in age. The boys were placed in her home at birth, through the foster care system. She had met four of... more

I was so proud of my son on Friday night. What teen boy who will be turning 18 next month would want to take his three younger brothers to a movie? I couldn’t believe that he offered to do it. His younger brothers were ecstatic about going with him, even though they had already seen the Transformers movie. They were just happy to be spending an evening with their big brother whom they idolize.

They loaded up in his car and off they went. I waited up long enough to be sure that they were home. They had a great time, enjoyed the popcorn and the movie, so I headed off to bed.

About... more

Why does sibling bonding time among brothers seem to usually involve wrestling on the furniture, the floor, or the ground. Inevitably, one ends up teary and in need of an ice pack. Something of mine usually gets broken or clothing is ripped and I get to sew it or replace it. One ends up tattling on the other, probably because he didn’t win. Just when you think all is quiet, the boys are at it again.

The next day they are perfectly happy to go ride bikes together, play video games, or go fishing together as if they never fought. They don’t seem to hold a grudge against... more

You’ve adopted a sibling group and now one of the children is old enough to drive. Do you allow your child to get a driver’s license as soon as legally possible? Do you let the older sibling transport the younger children? What type of problems might arise from the driving privilege?

We definitely encountered some unforeseen difficulties when we allowed our daughter to get her license. She took up smoking for a while, which she could easily do away from home in her car. She once threatened her younger sister with severe bodily damage if she exposed her secret.

We... more

What if you are fostering a sibling group and the time has come to move towards adoption, but not for the whole sibling group? There are various reasons this might happen. One of the siblings may be acting out in such a way that the agency feels that child isn’t ready to be adopted, but the other siblings are ready. The siblings may not have the same two birth parents, and one hasn’t had parental rights terminated yet. One of the siblings may be eligible for services and the other not.

Unfortunately, these circumstances usually arise with older children who are very aware... more

It has been over three years since they left our home, two children, whom we love very much. They were part of our family for 18 months. We made the mistake of taking “ownership” of them after the rights of their parents were terminated by the state. At the time of the TPR, no other families were interested in adopting them that we knew of, except us. They had come to live with us at two months of age and 2 years of age.

There was another family, living three hours away in another state that had adopted the three older siblings. They didn’t know that the TPR... more

“Mom, why did we have to adopt my brother?” Buck asked exasperatedly after Ty, his younger brother, had followed him around all day. “Because you are such a wonderful son we figured your brother would be too, and we wanted you to be raised together,” I answered.

“Are you sure we are really brothers? You know the hospital or the state could have made a mistake,” he queried.

“There was no mistake Buck, you definitely both have the same mother. Both of you were placed with us straight from the hospital and I have the original birth certificates.”... more

My friends adopted a sibling group of five children many years ago. I have a special connection with this adoptive family because we parented two of their children. You see the siblings were split into two foster homes the first two times they came into foster care. These children really look like siblings probably because each has the same two birth parents, uncommon in foster care from my experience. Therefore, one might assume that their needs and goals might be similar. However, each child’s needs are very different.

One... more

The first sibling group that we adopted was two sisters who also had an older sister placed with an aunt. It was almost 12 years ago that our daughters came to live in our home. Now our adopted daughters are all grown up, and the older of the two sisters has two children. That’s right we are now proud grandparents.

Yesterday, our oldest granddaughter turned two years old. There was quite a gathering at our older daughter’s house for the birthday party. You see we maintained an open relationship with our daughters’... more

When Super Dad and I started out parenting, I felt that all of our children should be treated equally. Whatever we did for one child had to be done for every child, (Probably some baggage I carried from my own childhood.), and then we adopted children. A time came when I was compelled to begin homeschooling three of our adopted children.

However, since all of our children needed to be treated equally, I started my first year of homeschooling with seven students and a toddler in diapers. A few years later, I learned the... more