I don’t always remember to tell my children about the origins of each holiday. Since we homeschool, it is up to me, the teacher to explain the significance and history of each holiday. The worldviews held by my children were developed and influenced through exposure to our family, our church, our sports teams, and various foster children. Public schools usually have themes for holidays including stories, projects, and assignments. I guess I need to put a little more effort into that area of homeschooling. Perhaps I could do a monthly bulletin board or something. I realized this... more

I attended a very interesting permanency planning hearing today and learned a little about having tribal law take precedence. When children are in foster care, the State Department must make reasonable effort to reunite the children with their parents. Making reasonable effort means offering assistance in a passive manner. For example, the worker offered the parents bus passes, the worker made a referral for counseling, the worker suggested the parents put in applications at subsidized housing.

If the parents do not follow up on the workers recommendations, then after... more

One of my friends was telling me the other day about her son’s girlfriend. She goes to college, plays basketball, works, attends church regularly, and she is berating him for not attending church. Wow, good for him she sounds wonderful, I told her. But, she is black, she added. She still sounds perfect to me. Would you prefer him to date a white, unemployed, high school dropout? You should be thrilled that he found a girl with goals and morals. She agreed with me, what else could she do.

My youngest daughter is biracial. She has dark skin, dark eyes, and dark... more

If you have decided on transracial adoption, should you adopt more than one child of the race you are considering? Many years ago, when we first considered adoption, I felt very strongly about transracially adopted children having at least one sibling that they could identify with racially and culturally. I felt it was somehow unfair to the transracially adopted child to be the only one in the family that looked different. Now our family has completed a transracial adoption.

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When I was in undergrad I went to a Black Student Union meeting and was the only yellow face there. I wrote about it. I call this piece "Black Just Like You". I hope that it depicts how I think we as blacks and Asians need to get past squabbling and get on with talking. We'd be surprised by what we have to say and how we feel. Oppression can do that to you though. It's called hopelessness and frustration. By the way, I love being Asian....

BLACK JUST LIKE YOU

His eyes told me I did not belong- and then his mouth confirmed it. His comments echoed in my mind-... more

I have a treat for all of you today. It's an article and poem written by Jason Minh Alt, who was born in South Vietnam, and fled during Operation Babylift. It was previously printed in the Southern Arizona Families with Children from China newsletter a few years back when I was the newsletter editor.

You may wonder what it has to do with adoption. Like many adoptive parents who have adopted internationally, my children are of a variety of races. I have four biological children who though contain a smidgen (1/8)of Mexican blood, by... more

"I'm not a racist". You hear it often, and perhaps even say those words yourself. As a mother of four biological children with British/German/Hispanic ancestry, two Chinese sons and a Haitian daughter, I have always felt myself to be very open minded when it comes to race, even to the point where I felt I could state with confidence, "I'm not a racist."

I feel as if I successfully model to my children that we don't judge people based on the color of their skin. After all, my children have spoken of friends and it wasn't until... more

part 1

I don't believe racist comments should ever be ignored, but as the saying goes, "you attract more flies with honey than vinegar". We can return hatred for hatred, or we can attempt to educate others through kindness. Ruby was a superb example of love and forgiveness of those who treated her with hatred. Here in her own words, she said:

I couldn't have gotten through that year without Mrs. Henry.... Sitting next to her in our classroom, just the two of us, I was able to forget the world outside.

I remember her explaining integration to me and why some people were... more

Martin Luther King. Rosa Parks. Say their names and most people can tell you who they were and what they represented. Sadly, however, mention the name Ruby Bridges to an average American adult or school-age child and you might draw a blank look.

For those of you who may not know her story, this sweet and innocent little girl was one of the first to desegregate schools in New Orleans, Louisiana. The other children who would be integrating attended a different school, so she ended up being the only black child at her elementary school... more

part 1

What causes racism? Psychologists, including Darlene and Derek Hopson who wrote Different and Wonderful: Raising Black Children in a Race-Conscious Society have done numerous studies showing that we definitely aren't born racist. It is a learned attitude and behavior. One friend told me that she believes the media perpetuates it. Another feels that it is picked up in the "mobocracy" type attitudes that develop in large public schools due to a "survival of the fittest" type attitude that shows up on the playground. If you're the odd man out or minority when it comes to skin color,... more