“Who is your favorite kid, Mom?” “Am I your favorite?” “He is your favorite, that’s why you let him have one of your sodas, right?” “Why do you like my brother best?” “You like the girls better than the boys, don’t you?” “The baby is your favorite isn’t she?” Which version of this question have you heard? If you are parenting several children from various backgrounds then you have probably heard them all, just as I have. For a few years, I tried to argue. I tried to tell the questioning child that I loved them all equally. Eventually, after years of being worn down, I just started... more

Yes, there are many positives of being a large adoptive family. Unfortunately, this week I have been living through one of the negative attributes of a being a large adoptive family. I wrote about Rotavirus going through our family and affecting everyone a couple of weeks ago. This week, it has been the 48-hour flu bug. We kept our granddaughters Saturday night, knowing that earlier in the week, they had the flu. Apparently, they were still contagious. They are 12 months and two, Amigrace, our toddler, is 20 months. Being toddlers, they frequently sampled each other’s sippy cups,... more

Imagine living with eight children, five of whom have had rotavirus for the past two weeks. While Super Dad and I tried to stay healthy, it was just a matter of time until the rotavirus spread to us. It is hard to avoid contracting a virus from sick toddlers who don’t cover their mouths when they cough, have chronic diarrhea, and sleep in your bed when they feel sick. It has been over two weeks since SD and I have been able to sleep all night. Little children always seem to run the highest fevers in the middle of the night. Worried parents stay awake after giving them... more

When I first retired from full time employment as a cost accountant, I wanted my household to be organized and efficient. We had accepted an infant as a foster care placement giving us four young boys at home at the time. I had also been licensed to provide daycare to unrelated children before retiring and was watching two toddlers full time. I was used to getting up at 5:30 every morning and continued to do so, for a few years. Everything I did, I did in a hurry including running up and down stairs.

There wasn’t an emergency, I was just trying to accomplish as much... more

Did sitting around like couch potatoes all day just watching TV cause the behavior problems of the siblings you adopted? There are those who suggest that TV is responsible for everything from lethargy and obesity to shortened attention spans. A new study even suggests that if you begin limiting your children’s TV viewing before the age of six, you may be able to reverse the negative effects.

The American Academy of Pediatrics suggests that kids shouldn’t watch TV for more than two hours a day and children under two shouldn’t watch it at all. Researchers... more

Whenever they are playing games, sharing snacks, or just helping others, do your children who are birth siblings always choose each other instead of a sibling by adoption? It doesn’t seem to matter how long the siblings have been in your home. Their choices never seem to take into consideration who is the most deserving or needy at the time either. It doesn’t even matter if they are passing out extra chores; they still choose their birth siblings.

As a parent, I sometimes find this phenomenon a bit frustrating. I like to think that I treat my children as equally as... more

Do your younger children seem to pick up the behaviors and attitudes of their older brothers and sisters? Do they ever pick up the positive attributes? Maybe I’m just having a difficult week, but it seems to me that my younger children only acquire the negative attributes of their older siblings. They seem to pick up those little behaviors or quirks that annoy you and make you nuts.

One of my adult daughters always chewed her nails so short that they bled and then she would begin chewing on the sides of her fingers. Apparently, Lyn thought that was a really neat thing... more

When our daughters came to live with us they were seven and 13-years-old. They were very pretty, quiet girls, who seemed quite shy. Everyone who met them thought they were the sweetest girls and that we were very lucky to have such wonderful new daughters.

Despite the considerable difference in their ages, they were quite close. The older sister would frequently read stories to the younger or they would play board games together. I would have preferred to split them up, and have them each share a bedroom with a child... more

At the Christian school that I attend, the eighth graders in my class are taking a social skills class during the first period of the day. This class focuses on building solid foundations for learning and using proper social behavior. It also focuses on developing good moral character, manners and etiquette. One of the neat things about this class is the boys have to practice their manners at lunch by pushing in the seats of the girls in my class. We are also learning proper table manners, social manners and verbal manners.

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Being a good sibling also means being a good daughter or son. Before the adoption of Gracesyn, I never knew the effort my mom and my dad had to put into raising me. Since the adoption of Grace, I understand and appreciate a little more about the hard work it takes to care for a little one. As a small thank you to my parents I can help them out as they care for the needs of a busy toddler. Here are a few suggestions you may want to consider to help your parents.

After a long day at work, coming home to care for a little one while cooking... more