I still struggle with wanting to be the perfect mother for my older adopted children. I know they have witnessed so many failures over the years by their loved ones. They have been let down and disappointed to the point of expecting it. That is why I have tried to be a super mom over the years. The mom who never changes her mind, misses an appointment, or reneges on anything. It is a tough calling; obviously none of us are able in our own power to pull off such perfection. I have gotten a little better over the years because our children also need to know that it is ok to fail.... more

Waiting for your child to come home when you are trying to adopt can be both a trying and exhausting experience. As an adoptive mother, I often felt that the theme for my life should have been “hurry up and wait.” Even from the beginning when I would rush through parts of my dossier that I could control, I would find myself stuck waiting on a social worker to get around to finishing my homestudy.

If you’ve adopted internationally, you know how emotionally exhausting it can be to wait for your I-171H approval from the Immigration... more

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I found myself just holding on to the papers for about a week, praying for the comfort that I received earlier in his adoption process that told us to press forward. I emailed my very dear friend, Cindy, whom I knew would understand, because one of the children she has adopted can be quite difficult. Would God send me two incredibly difficult children? After all, I already had one child who was no cake walk. Her reply was a huge answer to prayer... more

This painting by Greg Olsen is one of my favorites. It's titled "Be Not Afraid", and it gives me courage and inspiration whenever I look at it...especially when I hear comments like this:

"Eleven years old? That's the age where I start to want to get rid of my boys! I can't imagine bringing home an 11 year old boy!"

That's what a friend told me when I announced our adoption to her, and I assure you she wasn't alone in her comments. I heard quite a few along those lines... more

"One plus God is sufficient." This is an idea that was shared with me at a church meeting this week and one that has caused me to ponder.

When David slew Goliath, the odds seemed to be against David. He was small, a mere shepherd boy--not a trained soldier, and he didn't even have any armor the right size to protect himself. All he had was a slingshot and 3 small stones. He had God on his side, however, and one plus God is sufficient.

When we decided to pursue all three of our adoptions, it was with nudging... more

I love this photo. I loved it the first time I saw it almost 15 years ago in an LDS church magazine for youth in their teenage years, and love it even more now that it resembles my own family photo. I have it in poster size in my home and have "getting it framed and on the wall" on my list of 1,000 things to do.

If you can't read the print clearly, it says, "God created the races, but not racism. We are all children of the same Father. Violence and hatred have no place in His family." (See Acts 10:34)

You can google... more

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I don't believe racist comments should ever be ignored, but as the saying goes, "you attract more flies with honey than vinegar". We can return hatred for hatred, or we can attempt to educate others through kindness. Ruby was a superb example of love and forgiveness of those who treated her with hatred. Here in her own words, she said:

I couldn't have gotten through that year without Mrs. Henry.... Sitting next to her in our classroom, just the two of us, I was able to forget the world outside.

I remember her explaining integration to me and why some people were... more

Martin Luther King. Rosa Parks. Say their names and most people can tell you who they were and what they represented. Sadly, however, mention the name Ruby Bridges to an average American adult or school-age child and you might draw a blank look.

For those of you who may not know her story, this sweet and innocent little girl was one of the first to desegregate schools in New Orleans, Louisiana. The other children who would be integrating attended a different school, so she ended up being the only black child at her elementary school... more

Adding a new child through adoption can be very stressful regardless of whether your child is a baby or an older child. Having had a new son in our home for only 3 weeks, our other children are still adjusting to where each person fits in our new family dynamics.

If your new child unknowingly sits where one of your other children has always sat at the dining room table, it can cause friction. Even where each child sits when watching television might change, and previous siblings might resent the new child as a result.

When... more

Jenna, on the Birth parent/First Parent blog has started a wonderful series on Faith and Adoption that I would encourage you to read. Today, she has a beautiful post on Praying for your Placed Child.

Faith has also played a major role in our adoptions, both in how we chose to proceed, and how we have turned to God for strength when difficulties arose. I awoke this morning feeling that I needed to share a story that a friend sent me yesterday. My... more