Holiday Joy

January 14th, 2014

I can't believe it was already our 3rd Christmas with the Littles, who are really not so little any more. This year, everyone was old enough to remember what Christmas is all about, which is both good and bad news. They truly had a lot of fun. On Christmas Eve after dinner, each child in our family gets to open one present. That gift always contains pajamas.  This was instituted the year I realized that my kids always looked neglected in the holiday photos because I had not given a thought to their Christmas pajamas. So everyone gets pajamas and the photos look great. (Except this year I could not find the camera on Christmas morning. Oh well, best laid plans!) Last year they were so excited about that Christmas Eve… [more]

Birth Sibs

November 5th, 2013

My mom and I made the 4 hour trek to take Pepper to see her birth siblings. (Technically they are half-siblings. I don't think it matters to them or us!)  Our last visit several years ago was a little tricky because both Pepper and her sister were in a difficult time in their lives. It just wasn't the family reunion my daughter hoped for. I think it was also very hard for her seeing the challenging life her sister had.  It was a couple years ago and it was a "getting to know you" visit. This visit, however was different. One thing that made a huge difference was that in the time since that meeting, we'd all three corresponded on Facebook and we'd occasionally heard from the youngest brother too.  (Pepper… [more]

Adjusting

October 20th, 2013

coffeeThankfully when we were going through the process of adopting our daughter we had some idea of when she would arrive.  With my son, we did not know anything about him.  We just received a call  he had been born and we could go pick him up.  My daughter did come two weeks early so that was a surprise.  The wild thing was a couple of days before she was born, I went in to total nesting mode.  Our house was the cleanest it had been since we moved in.  I thought it was awesome that I was able to experience the feeling of needing to "nest" and not being pregnant.  As far as being ready, we had everything we needed because… [more]

The Pecking Order

October 15th, 2013
Categories: Birth Order

We've been talking a lot about birth order lately. This is mostly due to the fact that Tinker has entered another of her "bossy, bossy, know-it-all" phases and the boys aren't taking it well. As the middle child, frankly, she does not get enough attention. I understand this well enough -- I am a middle child too! As a response to her bossiness, the boys have united together into a gluey bond that completely shuts her out. It is heartbreaking for her but as an outside observer, I can see their point. They don't like her telling them how to have fun, how to eat, what to wear, and so forth. They play together (mostly) quite well. She loves being in the middle. Tinker has been known to cry when her turn… [more]

When Things Don’t Work Out

September 29th, 2013

broken hearted 1I knew that when I got married I wanted at least two kids. When we started having infertility issues I began to think that we would not even have one kid.  All that changed when I started a new job and we moved. We were able to save up for adoption. After we adopted our son, my desire to have more children became stronger. I was ready to start the process again.  As many of you know though adoption can be expensive.  Our savings was completely gone now.  It was going to take awhile to save up again. When my son was about one and a half we received a call from the adoption agency.  They had been in contact… [more]

Where are We and How on Earth Did We Get Here?

September 18th, 2013

real babies3-1/2 years into this journey of "sibling adoption," I still run into people who don't know about our three Littles. When they smile quizzically at the "cling-on" glued to my leg, I quickly explain that we adopted three little ones, almost three years ago. Most people then react in this way, they look at my gray hair and my "nearly grown" teens, shake their heads in wonder and say, "I don't know how you do it but I admire you." Let me set the record straight right here: We are a far from perfect family and far less than perfect parents. We love our kids to pieces but it's true -- we may be a little old for this stuff! There… [more]

10 Tips for Taming Wild Week-days

September 11th, 2013

DSCN7718Yep. School started -- and along with it all the wild week days: Lunches, backpacks, waterbottles, folders (HATE them), homework - it's a wild world here. The boys have now had 2 full weeks of school, Pepper and Tinker are in weeks 3 and 4 respectively.  I admit it, having a staggered start to school is what saved me.  But now a full month in, I have to tame the madness a bit or go crazy.  I thought I"d remind myself (and you) of a few things that really keep the calm:

  1. Start the week with enough clean clothes for everyone. Do laundry as the week progresses but do it all on the weekend and start with a minimum of 5

Will They Bond

August 30th, 2013

heartSometimes kids are excited to get a new brother or sister and sometimes they are not.  For us, our son was so excited about having a new sister.  When you have biological children you know you kids will have a lot in common.  They may share the same eye color, same hair color, and share same personality quirks.  Not only will they be bonded by how they look, but they are bonded by genetics.  Naturally I was worried if my children would be close or have an emotional bond because my children would not share their looks or genetic background.  My brother and I share the same smile and have the same knees. My children will not grow up sharing those… [more]

Teens Dealing with Adoption

August 21st, 2013

IMG_0399My new job gives me the opportunity to educate people about adoption. Most folks don't know much at all about the process, particularly about how adoption plays out in the teen years.  Both our older girls have birth siblings they've never met. Pepper has 5 half-siblings (4 living), and Sunshine has 1 half-sibling.  Pepper has met the youngest of her group and the only girl. I know we say it all the time but it bears repeating, grief is a natural part of adoption. At different ages in the adopted person's life, they grieve anew. Being adopted is hard on both my teens. In Pepper's case, the loss of her birthmother several years ago threw her for a loop. That was the impetus… [more]

A New Sister

August 10th, 2013

children's booksOur son was 3 and half when we started the process for adopting another baby.  Before we even began talking to him about adopting a new baby, he would ask us, "Where is my baby sister?"  My husband and I would just look at each other in complete shock.  We were very careful not to talk about adopting another baby until we had been approved.  I believe God gave him that intuition.  When we finally started talking about having another baby we read a lot of children's books to him.  Most of these books were about having a new sibling and the others where about adopting. Books helped us a lot with talking about adoption with our son.  We would ask him… [more]